I need to focus. Seriously.


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Now playing: The Shins - Kissing The Lipless
via FoxyTunes

love ink says: (10:25:13 PM)
do you want to go haji!
this is a sick cycle carousel \ says: (10:25:23 PM)
haha whuudddd
this is a sick cycle carousel \ says: (10:25:26 PM)
as in pilgrimage?

I'm counting down 5 4 3 2 1.
Edgar Allen Poe, thank god he came out for the unseen poems. For some inane reason, only his poems are fathomable to me.
I'm random, I know.
High on life. Low on addiction.
Need. to. focus.

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8 essays down, three more to go.

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An ending fitting for the start
you twist and tore our love apart
your light fingers threw the dart
shattered the lamp- into darkness it cast us...

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One more down, two more to go!
4 more days. i wait.

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Two papers and I feel like it's the end of the world already. Honestly, the conditioning of paper chase is highly unhealthy for a young growing individual like me. I'm sorry, it's the aftermath of brain drainage. Anyhoo, thai was quite alright. It wasn't terrible awful, neither was it very easy either. I can't say it is doable as I really don't want to rest my laurels just yet. In one question, we had to make a sentence using two words, yen and khcc. For some inane reason, I just could not for the love of god recall what khcc meant! So what did I write?
wannii tccn yen nccng saaw chan thaam phcc waa "khcc" pl33 waa ?aray.
Translation: Today, at night, my younger sister asked dad what "khcc" means.
Acts of desperation during times of pressure.

European history was terribly awful. All the ones I had been banking on did not come out, and instead, it had to be some weird mambo jumbo that I could hardly think of points to answer! My essay lacked argument and analysis. Merely listing? It was more like randomly spewing out facts. Halfway through, my brain decided to abandon me and take a trip to mars, hence I was left stoning for a full fifteen minutes! I kid you not. A complete loss of track of my essay towards the end, it was like Hitler's turning point at the Battle of Stalingrad. Everything went spiraling downwards uncontrollably from then on. I had desperately hoped that this exam would pull me through the module. I guess a jumble of words thats disguising itself as an essay won't bring me such luck huh.

3 more to go. Next saturday. I am waiting for you.

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Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

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Soya sauce in yong tau foo soup is disgusting
I don't care if you should think it is the chinese way
to drown everythink on your tray with soyasauce
it's still gross

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My stumble application has just dieed on me. I think it's a sign to start studying.

* they were supposed to write antonyms but they just inverted the characters!





Some funny stuff I stumbled upon

Whoever said uni is the best time of your life,
and that alevel's are the toughest exams ever,
should be shot. Dead flat.

Sev, please join me in my plan to revolutionize schools and eradicate the word examinations from the dictionary. Thank you very much.

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I woke up at the crack of dawn today, which is an immensely impossible feat for me, honestly. Okay, so 830am is not exactly the time the cock crows, but still! Only Australians, farmers, audrey and nikki are up and about at that time. Anyhoo, I was off to school to study, i.e. rewatch my film texts which I did not complete since I realized that there was nothing stylistically significant about the movie. Sociology review tutorial was a bore, but I'm really happy about my midterm assignment grade :).







So we aren't the best students around, sue us

The exams are but five days away.
Am I prepared for it? No, unfortunately not.
Do I anticipate it? Yes, I do since I was privy to the foreknowledge of it.
Did I study for it? Yes, I did. I truly am. But sometimes, it takes more than just scouring through your textbook and trying to transfuse the knowledge to do well for the exams.

The Great War was expected to end by Christmas of 1914, a lovely gift from Santa would it not be? My mind is ague with delirium and my thoughts are restless. A simple task of sitting at the table and transferring words from page to brain has turned into a tumultous task. At times, I wonder if it would be better if I was smarter. But then again, what are smarts without an appropriate attention span? What are brains if I can't even sit still and absorb the information without having to walk to the kitchen after reading just a single line?

Tv dinners are silent killers, just like smoking is. They erode your body and melt your brains, just like how smoke and tar would inundate your lungs and fester the little growths that look like cauliflowers. A frozen lasagne dances in the microwave, the oven chimes as your dinner comprising of leftovers have heated up. Onions and rice. Bubbling cheese in a black box, a lava of tomato sauce spills. Ambrosia.

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It's so amazing how much your own mother can surprise you with their rocketing improvement in their dexterity with text messages. From perpectually typing in capital letters, to weird spellings like "clavar mather", it has finally reached the day where I received a fully comprehensible text, with little quirks in it to add.


As you can see from the reply, after I told her I didn't feel like going for the exhibitions anymore.

Oh yes, I found a couple of photos in my camera from the art exhibition...



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Now playing: Cobra Starship - Guilty Pleasure
via FoxyTunes

Alrighty, I just got back from the exhibition. It was kind of boring, very much small talk and sipping wine. There were a few interesting characters there though, like I saw Dr Woffles Wu! hahah, and honestly I think he did some work on himself. Met this guy who was the ex-ceo of some big advertising company in asia and has now retired to do some screen writing for a movie he's planning to make.

My uncle was really funny cuz he was supposed to help my bro do some networking with a few big shot bankers, and all he did was take my brother over, introduced him and ran away, eaving my poor old bro stranded there! And I just found out he was the previous owner of the grinning gecko, yep the very one at central library. He was like "Back in my day it was very happening, but after those guys took over..." when I told him I hardly ate there. Hence, he was immensely pleased when I told him it's kinda dead now.

Sorry for the lack of pictures, but I always felt awkward whipping out my camera for no reason. Maybe i'll put some up when the photos are sent over. Two more exhibitions on sunday! One is my mum's friend's, about ceramics, and the other is andy warhol. Sure is a rush against time.

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To sleep is to dream.

I really need to start trying to wake up earlier. I had to dragged myself out of bed to go for soiology lecture (I went to bed at like 4 am cuz I was reading my Sandman comic, so much for being a mugger!), half contemplating if it was really worth it or not. Turns out, it really wasn't at all! The whole thing ended in like an hour, in which most of it was spent talking with zi hua.

Interesting moments of the day:
1) Sat with the swedish guy from soci class on the shuttle bus and found out his dad is a director (short films and tv) who is trying to earn enough money to make a feature film, HOW AWESOME IS THAT! Ups his cool factor!
2) We uncovered one mystery of soci class, the guy that never opens his mouth is local. Now, if we could only unravel the mystery of whether the swede really only has three sets of clothes in his wardrobe!
3) Okay, this isn't really an interesting moment but WHY DOES EVERYONE WHO HEARS I WANT TO DO FILM STUDIES THINK IM GONNA BE A DIRECTOR?!? I would rather much be on the final end of the creative process thank you very much. I watch films, nt make them.
4) KFC craving that reared its greedy fried chicken head during lecture was satisfied:))). Kudos to Debra for helping us search online for the nearest kfc around! Now that's one of the great uses of technology!

I hope Yueli aunt's art exhibition is going to be interesting later, and not just mundane small talk with adults. Shall catch up on sleep first.

Oh yes, I'm not sure what nikki really wants, but I think she wants me to do this quiz? So here it is, an atonement for my absence online lately. Napolean just keeps me so busy!

Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following. They have to be real places, names, and things. You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name. Nothing made up!

Your name: Xiaoan
Four words: xanthippe, xanadu, xray, xylophone
State/country: Xiamen
Boy Name: Xavier (HAHA NIKKI!)
Girl Name: Xena (western names starting with x just tends to sound so comic like)
Occupation: XMEN
Something you can wear: Xray glasses
Something found in a kitchen: xtremely dubious objects that pass off as food?
Something you shout: X MARKS THE SPOT!
Something you do at school: xenophobes monday lunch meetings; xenophile library stalking
Name of an animal: XO drunks
Name of a Drink: XO
Name a Holiday: Xiaoan's birthday
Name a body part: Xylem (ok that's part of a plant but who cares)

I've crossed oceans of time to find you

I can't stop watching this. Need to wean off my dracula phase.

clipped from youtube.com

I swear, I will really start studying from tomorrow, or rather today, onwards. But just for now, just for now let me enjoy a bit of my freedom. I watched two movies and I daresay, I do not in the least regret watching them instead of studying.

The Crow is really a cult film, to the truest sense of the word. Great gritty atmosphere, set in a dark dank city teeming with evil and urban decadence. The soundtrack must be one of the best around, with stone temple pilots and such. It was goth in all its glamour. Brandon Lee was excellent as the tortured dead rock star who came back to life to avenge his and his wife's tragic deaths. Quoting Edgar Allen Poe, playing his electric guitar on the rooftop amidst the decaying state of the city, lithe and quirky movements all combined to a hero that I would very much like to call my own. One gripe though, one painful gripe was the existence of Bai Ling in the movie. Honestly, just her mere appearance could downgrade a movie so much. Certain parts of the narrative was slightly disjunctive but hey, it's from a comic eh? Best quote "Victims, aren't we all?

The second film I watched is really one I want to rave about. Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992)! I really took pains to find this movie. First at esplanade library which only had the videotape version, and next videoezy which didn't have it at all! Thank god for a few lovely souls who posted it up on the net:). Anyway, the movie had an all stellar cast, with Gary Oldman, Winona Ryder and Anthony Hopkins. These few really made the movie shine as they sank into the roles, perfect accents and all. Oldman seems to be particularly apt at playing the tortured lover, Sid and Nancy anyone? Hopkins as usual, was up t his game with the quirky, intelligent Professor Van Helsing who added much humour (albeit a dark one), to the film.

One peeve, was the casting of Keanu Reeves as Jonathan Harker. For one, get rid of that surfer accent dude! I almost died when he said "It's that guy!", half expecting him to jump up and go COWABUNGA! HANG TEN DUDETTE! Hmph. Anyway, Coppola really owned with the cinematography. A sort of more old school film style (reminds me of Ed Wood), with a touch of theartrics. The eerie music, dry ice mists and howling "music" of the wolves really set the atmosphere. Everything, and I mean, EVERYTHING was set for that period, and it was classic horror without all that new technology gimmicks we have nowadays.

The narrative was very true to the book, and it definetly is the most sad, tragic and yet, most romantic storylines ever. Yes, I cried. And to give it extra credit, I usually don't cry in movies! I'm a tough one yo. So yah, I really want to bawl when Mina had to stab Dracul to end his suffering, and the camera panned to the mural on the ceiling of Dracul holding the dead mina. Tears flowed, too, when Dracul struggled with himself, as he tried to reject Mina's offer to join him in the eternal life, knowing how torturous it is. My heart positively melted when he met her again in London for the first time, "I have crossed oceans of time just to find you." I'm sorry for not recounting this in order as my mind doesn't realy seem to work chrnologically.

All in all, great two movies which are to be added to my favourites list:)))).
I want to watch movies for the rest of my life.



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Now playing: HIM - him - dark light - vampire heart(2)
via FoxyTunes

I finally had a day in which I did not completely waste at home. Ran some errands before meeting prawn to study at city hall starbucks. Went to esplanade library for a bit, as I wanted to borrow some films. But but but! All the films I wanted to borrow were in tape form! Who still has vcrs nowadays huh?!?! So we tried to study somemore, but all the attention span had been exhausted previously and we went to have dinner at kfc instead( KFC NIKKI! KFCEEEEE). I would like to say that oreo with strawberry cream is very nice. Not because the colour combination is my favourite one(even though it does gain some brownie points for being pink and black), but also because the flavours really went well! Why didn't nabisco (or kraft) ever come up with it? Everyone has heard of strawberry dipped in chocolate, so why did it take so long to invent such a flavour? The world works n strange ways.

I would like to just waste my days. Just sit in the open under the cool night sky. Clouds scampering and morphing above me, as if I was under an everchanging mural. The smoke from my cigarette slowly wafting up, I feel as if I'm part of the sky. Not a care for the world, not a worry about school, exams or my inadequacies. Just me, the wind and the nightsky.

And my internet is up again! whoopee!

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When the silence beckons,

And the day draws to a close,

When the light of your life sighs,

And love dies in your eyes,

Only then will I realise,

What you mean to me

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Sorrow rebuilds me as I step out of the light
misery strengthens me as I say my goodbyes

Sometimes I wonder if this is really the path I should be walking
if I am really cut out for school or for this course.
Sometimes I question my existence
since I seem to lack all adequacies to walk through life.
Sometimes I wonder,
how great it would be when I discover my true path.
Yet at times I wallow,
when I realize it may never be found.

I could listen to HIM forever and ever.
Just lock myself in a room,
and hit the play button.
Over and over,
the deep seductive voice of Ville
played over and over.
Lazy entrails of smoke sting my eyes,
ashes heat up the room.
And the radio plays his voice
over and over.

Uncle Hans was on tv just now! It was quite interesting to see him being interviewed for Discovery Travel and Living since he's a scenic photographer and all, but also that I haven't seen him for so long I hardly recognized him. Imagine my surprise whenmy mum was like "Eh Uncle Hans!". Haha. But honestly, he's living my dream life. Travelling, doing what he loves, dabbling in all sort of businesses like hotels and publishing, and getting paid for it. Makes me fearful and a slight tinge of hope for my future.
Also, I find it very very odd how caucasians are immensely interested in Asian culture while we tend to strive for westernization. Strange way the world ticks huh.

My group video for sgfilm!

Today started out as a really awful day.
1) I couldn't fall asleep until six am even though I went to bed at three. Plus I had a group meeting in the afternoon so I had to force myself to get up early!
2)The school replied my email stating that my Giro application was unsuccessful due to mismatch of signature and thumbprint. I really apppreciate their efficiency in informing the matter AFTER I asked them about it when they hounded me to pay up my tuition fees.
3)There's ANOTHER FUNERAL at my house, which makes it the THIRD ONE????
4)The guy standing in front of me at the busstop wore short short red shorts. And I really abhor men in short shorts. It's plain disgusting. Plus, he was a bulked up muscle dude with a beatles mop cut. Ew.
5) 162 refused to come so I had to take 54 and change bus, which made me even more late than ever.

However, the day got better as I found out Nard (I knw two leonards so that's how I differentiate them) was also late since he was lost around PS area, so I didn't feel that bad for being late. I saw him wondering around while I was on the bus, so I got down to guide him down the right path. LOL. Anyway, group meeting was good as we rewatched 15 and managed tot finish out power point presentation slides. Yay! Plus, we had this idea of doing it in a lucky draw style to facilitate participation. Dawn even suggested having a bell so that we could indicate it is question time! It's going to be very fun. We kept laughing nonstop, and tended to digress abit but we finished it which is good!

Dinner at raffles place plaza, a mini chippy picnic at the fountain. It was quite good to hear form Dawn that everyone feels very alienated in first year, but would learn to love uni once you pick the major you like. Went home with Nard who kept lamenting on my immense amount of free time which I just waste completely. Haha, I really should be studying for my exams but somehow, the fact hasnt struck me yet which is REALLY VERY BAD.

I reiterate. FUCKING SCHOOL ADMIN

This is damn funny. From the cobrastarships themselves:
"So Decaydance / FBR gave us $650,000 to make our new video, but we blew it all on a sports car, so we had to make a home video for 'Guilty Pleasure' on our own one Saturday afternoon. Enjoy!"
HAHHAHAH and the vid is really cute! I love their songs, makes me feel upbeat. Perks me up better than caffeine!

I swear, I hate nus. They sent me two emails demanding me to pay my tuition fees when I had applied for giro? Plus, they said if I don't pay up by thursday they would withhold my examination results. I dare think that they had in fact failed to process my application, so I really hope they would get it done without me having to go through the hassle of paying them in person since nets has a limit of $2000. Fucking administration hmph.

What Your Handwriting Says About You

You are a fairly energetic person. You know how do pace yourself, and you deal well with stress. You range from very outgoing to very shy. You are a shapeshifter who is very versatile. You adapt well, and you look at things from many angles. You are extravagant, over the top, and indulgent. You set trends and influence people. You need a lot of space in your life, and it's easy for you to feel stifled. You avoid commitment and responsibility whenever you can. You are a free thinker. You are unique, open minded, and artistic. You don't care what other people think. You are a poor communicator. No one really knows exactly what you're getting at.

What Does Your Handwriting Say About You?

You Should Be an Artist

You are incredibly creative, spontaneous, and unique. No one can guess what you're going to do next, but it's usually something amazing. You can't deal with routine, rules, or structure. You're easily bored. As long as you are able to innovate and break the rules, you are extremely successful. You do best when you: - Can work by yourself - Can express your personality in your work You would also be a good journalist or actor.

What Should You Be When You Grow Up?

I find it very amazing how first impressions vary among different people! After euro history tutorial (the very last one! boo and yay and the same time for obvious reasons), yongxue, Heike and I slacked at the deck (Heik was skipping her lecture as usual). Alex popped by soon after. Anyway, we were talking about Maris gay boldy builders and stuff, until we reached the topic of what we thought of each other at the start. I had thought Heike was some hip hop loving bimbo chick that goes suntanning(ok, that was xinhui's idea but stlll!), while Alex had found her goth! Another curious enigma was that yx had the impression I was a biker chick while Alex thought I was a goody goody librarian type. Talk about contrast.

Anyhoo, I realy want to get ink so am pretty looking forward to it even though Im dead afraid of the pain!